direction

try to rectify
i really miss it
i gonna find the way out

一年就这样结束了

我的人生旅途总是比别人“勇往直前”
原因是因为我总是不管前后左右，
额头挂个“勇”字，
加上固执，不理前因后果，
就往前冲！！！冲冲冲！！！
一条小鱼住在小河里，
常常为了见识这个世界，
不时就游到大海去，
看看什么是风浪，
受了伤又游回小河，
休养够了又贪玩再游到大海去，
能做到这样，不怕痛不怕受伤，
不是因为我的本事，而是因为，
因为我有你们，有一群永远都帮我疗伤的朋友，
在我需要你们的时候，永远挺我的贵人！
万分的感谢，没有你们，
我的生活都是苦涩的，
你们让我有甜蜜，笑容和幸福。。。。

永远记在心里的中学朋友
我的一群猪朋狗友，绝对是很好品种的猪和狗阿！
哈哈哈。。。我们的人数不多，
但是高矮肥瘦，爱读书不爱读书，好人坏人，乖和坏的，个性全然不同，
这五年来，有你们的扶持，带来的欢乐，
永远铭记在心。
雯雯：没有你，我的中学生活都不知道怎么开始，你可以说是陪我成长的好朋友，
无依无靠去到一所完全不认识的中学，你就是我的依靠，
我们虽然没机会一起读大学，但是人各有志，
大家往自己的方向去发展，我们不是平行线，有一天一定会碰见，
说不定，我们心里早已经碰见。一种默契，不需要言语来表达，无言的约定，
永远谢谢你做我的听众，感谢你扶持我，陪伴我，
扶我一把，我深深的祝福你幸福快乐，
要记住我这个会为朋友两肋插刀的将家禽！
佳芹非此家禽。。。
甄甄：你永远都是笑的，那么就不见，要脑海里想起你，看到你的画面，都是笑的，
看到你，让我觉得生活就是应该要笑，快乐痛苦都是一天，
你啊，也可以说是zat我最多最多的人，哈哈，
不过也是激发我的人，看到你的勤劳和人生态度，
我就会告诉自己别那么懒，积极点，
所以现在很懒惰，哈哈哈哈，
谢谢你当我是你的朋友，帮我听通告然后把消息通知我，
最好还是借我你的功课答案，
其实最重要的是，你到了很多欢乐给我，
你记得，不开心事要说出来，自己吞下去，没人了解的，
祝你前途无可限量！！
美芳：你是最气死我的一个，也是那么多个里面，帮你最多的，
毕业后还是接到你的电话最多，不过也好，证明自己很有用，
哈哈哈，我们当中，你的体型和个性完全倒反的，（没有要讽刺你的意思）
你看起来最大只，但是让我觉得你是最小的，的确是啦，
永远让人担心的小妹，我在家是最小的，但是因为你，
让我有机会学会照顾人，
你其实有自己的潜力，积极点，你也会有个春天的。
曾经做过我的出气筒，谢谢和抱歉，
谢谢你听我吐苦水，谢谢你体谅我的自我中心，
抱歉对你那么凶，
希望你一天比一天好！
楸茵：第一句先说“阿一鲍鱼”，
对我而言，意思不在鲍鱼，而是阿一，因为你，我觉得我还有个大家姐，
你的个性绝对是做number 1 的角色，大姐的风范，
跟你相处，我知道什么是大方，什么是随便，不斤斤计较，
跟你相比，我觉得自己好像特别小气，蛮不讲理，
从你的身上，我看到自己的缺点，让我觉得要改，
我从来没有看过你发脾气，你总是那么的好，随和，我很佩服你的耐力，
敬佩！！你也是个很积极的人，我觉得自己更应该活在当下，面对现实，
有你这个大姐肯定是幸福的，你在，问题就好像不是问题了，尤其下厨阿
希望你梦想成真。。。。

freak out

i am going to freak out!!
gonna insane!!!
but i wan to thanks all my buddies,
all yo greets and supports!!!
i always keep inside my heart!!!
and i miss your 10ports

clear my mind

everything will be fine
everything will be good
everything will be pretty

................
can we pretend the airplane in the night sky are like shooting stars??
if i really could use to make wish now make wish now make wish,
wish, ship reached and the bridge will be ready

wish~

Can we pretend that airplanes
In the night sky
Are like shooting stars
I could really use a wish right now (wish right now, wish right now)
Can we pretend that airplanes
In the night sky
Are like shooting stars
I could really use a wish right now (wish right now, wish right now)

i wanna cry~~

i dunno wat feeling right now,,,,
i so confused, despaired, miserable,
i dunno wat i can do now,
i so stress!!!
i very stresssssss!!!!!
i think i soon will crazy.
my life is very imbalance rite now,
i should study, focus on study,
but now my brain all think about finding job,
what the hell!
i shouldnt like tat,
but i know since i finish exam,
the working stress sure come,
now is the time already,
y so fast ?
i hate myself being like tat,
i wanna control my own life,
i dun wan being control,
i should rectify tat,
control the situation,
juz do watever i want and i can,
dont ever force myself do something i dun like,
i can ok!!!
never give up,
never die!!!!


i dunno this feeling can last for how long,
i dunno when i can rectify it,
i dunno when everything become smooth,
i dunno, i dunno, i dunno,
i also a normal human,
i m juz 19,
i should do 19 should do,
not 29 ok,
I DUNNO!!!!!!!!!!
i m tired, when i can enjoy my truly teenager life??
a simple life,,,burst~

missing

miss u but i know better dun disturb u,
give u space is wat we want,
i hope tat u wont read my blog,
i know impossible,
actually i juz dun wan to purposely to tell u something by my blog,
because continuously, it wil become worse,
i dun wan blog become a tool or media to transfer my msg to u,
no other special meaning,,,,
when time gone, my blog wil become very fake,,,
i not wish to be like tat

U MAKE ME SMILE

You´re better then the best
I´m lucky just to linger in your life
Cooler then the flip side of my pillow that´s right
Completely unaware
Nothing can compare to where you send me
Lets me know that it´s ok yeah it´s ok
And the moments when my good times start to fade

You make me smile like the sun
Fall out of bed
Sing like a bird
Dizzy in my head
Spin like a record
Crazy on a Sunday night
You make me dance like a fool
Forget how to breathe
Shine like gold
Buzz like a bee
Just the thought of you can drive me wild
Ohh you make me smile

Even when you´re gone
Somehow you come along
Just like a flower poking through the sidewalk crack and just like that
You steal away the rain and just like that

today's mood -- fluctuated like cosine graph

Today my mood was going up and down like the cosine graph,
happy unhappy and unhappy happy,
In the early morning, i couldn't wake up on time because too sleepy due to night mare during the whole night, haiz....raining day some more, of course, i was late for the first account class, about 20 minutes..
moody and moody
so happy when went out and hang out with my friends -
mei xian, su kheng, hwei hwei, si xin, jasmine, amanda, praise and sharnali...
so happy because i bought a lot of cheap stuff!!!
they brought me to find low price stuff,
i bought earings, dress, accessories...
firstly, went to wendy at timesquare, my favourite burger and fries,
i love so much so happy!
then heading to sg wang,
shopped a lot of clothes shops,
i never regret what i bought today,
because is worth!
finally i wanted to go pavilion, because i want to find guy laroche wallet!
because too late already,
no one wants to follow me there but only mei xian accompany me,
mei xian, i appreciate u, thanks
without wasting any time, we directly walked into parkson and the women department,
stepped on the guy laroche counter and so disappointed,
2 reasons, firstly i hate elle, they mix elle and guy laroche together!
how come like that??!!
secondly of course i cant find the design i want...
walked the whole day from timesquare to sg wang and the pavilion,
i already tired, disappointed and wanted to give up at that moment,
but out of a sudden, i tell myself i cant give up like only!
i must try my very best to find it out,
then i asked permission from mei xian,
actually not, i was just like telling her only, she got no chance to choose at all,
i told her try to find at men department,
see whether available or not,
went to the 5th floor,
only can see guys clothes and shirt,
i cannot see any wallets,
i wish to ask the promoter there,
but i so lazy and because i sure they will answer me "i not sure", or maybe "i dunno",
i feeling so tired and stopped at a particular place,
and telling mei xian i gonna give up,
but actually i was standing in front of the guy laroche counter,
what a faith,
fine,
i so happy and so excited when i saw the wallet i want in the glass display,
so nervous!! i must get the correct one!!
finally, i can!!
i bought it, so happy, very happy, super happy!
but i got a bit hurt, when being scolded chisin,
nothing actually, i know not purposely,
but i still not manage to go 1u,
i have nothing left to say already.
this week i really realise so many things,
i know more now,
i know what the exactly happening now,
should be more sheng muk now,
sometimes we should learn how to let go,
i so confusing actually, sometimes...
but when days and days come,
i know what should i do clearer and clearer,
i can control the situation,
i can do it!!!!
badminton session was very productive, tiring, enjoying and satisfying,
i hit by friends with shuttle cocks,
2 times by 2 guys,
but i hate be your burden...

Guy Laroche!!!

i must buy u!!!!!!!
i sure can find out!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

了解

人家说“因了解而分开”
也有人说“分手吧，因为互不了解”
“了解”这个词，真的很恐怖。。。
了解分开，不了解也分开，
但是，往往，我就选择要去了解，
今天，应该说，这个礼拜来，
我了解了很多。。。
但是，原来了解，
不需要说出来，
全部都用，心，去感受，
我更了解你，就越看透你，
那么就知道，
该怎么做让你最舒服，
知道你要什么，
不要什么，
很简单的一个心理感受，
很清楚知道，
你不属于我，
你也不想做月亮了

neutral

这个词，在中文是什么？
我不知道，
中立？
并不然，因为并不能表达我的心情，
我不想些什么，
也由不得我想，
一切淡淡的来，
淡淡地去，
因为，就是因为neutral
不过于开心，不过于伤心，
一切适中就好！

保持乐观。。。

present 1/3 completed!!!

today i received a watch as present from someone very special,
a very special watch, i mean my first digital watch,
i never try b4...
well is purple, my favourite color tooo
actually i wish for 3 presents which i promised myself not to tell anyone,
see who is the special one will give me these 3....
1/3 has to be burst.... is watch....
the second alsoo burst already,
but the third!!! lol
i wont tell,
because i definitely will crazy on the person who matches all 3,
is like u buy 4D, kena all 4, and win the grand prize,
i wish i will meet the special one day, and kena the jackpot!!!
wau~~~
hahhahahahah,
but not too fast, maybe after 25,
however, maybe after 25,
not wish to get that,
or maybe after 25,
market value drop, and no more hope,
just say yes for any comers,
who know???
future....
but for tis moment, happy for the 1/3

truth

i love u always tell me the truth,
i like it,
even not sweet to hear,
but sweet to know,
truth,
i love truth,
sincere,
haha,
no matter fat, ugly,
i very appreciate!!!!!
thanks

stressful!!!

stress! really stress!!
i very stressful!!
exam is coming soon or can say just around the corner,
but me here still wasting time, not doing anything,
not motivated to do anything to rectify the situation,
i am damn fucking suck ok,
why i still wasting my precious time doing nothing??
since i got my ambition now, should i go ahead
and go go go and get my flying color result?
i should!!!
i should!!!
i know that, but,,,
what am i doing now totally opposite to what i suppose to do...
motivation!!!
dun lazy plz
LAZY KILL YOURSELF!!!!

dates under the moon~~

OK, ya, writing in english, is for u....
i hope that u have listened to the song i posted at facebook,
i really very confuse with myself,
i dunno what should i do actually,
i should believe my feeling or wat,
and wat's my feeling??
dunno what happens sometimes can very sure my feeling with him,
and dunno what happens sometimes can make me very confuse with that feeling,
i need a future!! but dunno why suddenly i feel that i can live better alone rather than with him,
i know very hurt and cruel to say this, but for this moment,
i believe u also feel that actually my life can be better also even without him,
i know u will raise up your both hands and even legs to support me,
but sometimes i really got problem to let go,
still the feeling there,
i confuse...

dates under the moon,,
honestly to tell u that actually i got think about totally concentrate on him,
and let u go and dun wan to see the moon at all,
but tis moment i feel like i want to hug the moon!!!
i want the moon,
but honestly again,
i dunno when i will swing and swift,
dunno when hate the moon,
dunno when dun wan the sun and
dunno when i will do something weird,
dunno when i will escape,
sometimes enjoy with the moon, sometimes scare with the moon,
sometimes sure like the sun, sometimes i dislike.

i juzt hopefully that u will understand that actually,
i am not playing fool with u or i purposely make u feel bad,
actually is my mood swing prob,
myself so complicated,
complicated and keep changing,
tat;s y i keep treat u with different mood.
haizl.....
i wish u happy, then i will really happy,
i am not purposely make u unhappy de,
and i hate u unhappy!
because i have to use a lot of energy to ,make u happy back.
please pity me la, happy more ok,.
very tired ok,....
i am not angry or blame u,
juz another method to make u always happy.ok.

for tis moment i choose to drag.............
til i know what should i do.
plz accompany me go til the end,
my fren~~
stil cannot life without u
frenship forever,, since tis is the way that can last longer and even forever...
agree with me??

你是我的幸福吗

总是相信有更好的,
会在前方,
就不顾一切的飘洋过海去,
用尽一生寻找
倦了累了渴望拥抱,
却找不到,
才忽然想起你还在我身后,
静静等着我,给我依靠
你是我的幸福吗?
为何幸福让人如此忧郁,
爱情渐渐模糊,
你的付出,
我总不够清楚,
你是我的幸福吗?
为何幸福让人变得忧郁,
我爱你不再怀疑,
只想对你说,我愿意..
总是相信有更好的,
会在前方,就不顾一切的飘洋过海去,
用尽一生寻找
倦了累了渴望拥抱,
却找不到,
才忽然想起你还在我身后,
静静等着我,给我依靠
你是我的幸福吗?
为何幸福让人如此忧郁,
爱情渐渐模糊,
你的付出,
我总不够清楚,
你是我的幸福吗?
为何幸福让人变得忧郁,
我爱你不再怀疑,
只想对你说,我愿意..
你是我的幸福吗?
为何幸福让人如此忧郁,
爱情渐渐模糊,
你的付出,
我总不够清楚,
你是我的幸福吗?
为何幸福让人变得忧郁,
我爱你不再怀疑,
只想对你说,我愿意

想要离开

我想要离开这个地方。。。。
不是因为我不喜欢，也不是因为不开心，
而是，，
很累，很厌倦，
我想突破。。。。
我想离开，
是逃避吗？不会是。
我确定吗？不确定。
只想来个转变，
变变变！！！
离开

适合与不适合

其实，我们到底适合对方吗？
我并不知道。。。
埋怨多余甜蜜。。。
请问适合吗？
应该用什么心态去面对呢？
能拖就拖，等时间到，
还是干脆利落点？
其实，有问题吗？
什么问题？
说不出。。。
那就是没有问题？
不，问题是存在的。。。
但不是现在想的时候，
果实还没成熟，
你并不知道果实能吃没有。。。
耐心等待。。。
等待果实成熟///
等。。。

两个人分手后多年，在一个城市不期而遇。

男问：“你好吗? ”

女答： “好。”

男问：“他好吗? ”

女答：“好。”

女问：“你好吗? ”

男答： “好。”

女问：“她好吗? ”

男答：“她刚才告诉我她很好。”

不开心！！！！！！

我不知道自己在执着什么！！！！
我需要的只是放，就是放，
放！！！！！！！
不要捉着不属于你的！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！

等待

等待是什么感觉的？什么滋味的？
我并不喜欢等待。。。
没耐性的我加上急性的我，
更说不上“等”，
每次都是因为“等不及”就生气，闹情绪，甚至闯祸，
但是我就是不喜欢等，
等，等，等，
等待可以是一种期待，但是等待也可能是种虐待，
我精神上的虐待。。。
因为不想等，也不要等，
你不要迟到，不要拖拖拉拉，不要婆婆妈妈，不要不确定
我不能等，不是我没有时间，而是我不想浪费时间。。。。

遗憾

理智和情感是分開的！人往往做的都不是照着自己想的去做>.<

人生中难免充满了遗憾，
有时候对着遗憾，可以说是无言以对，
遗憾，
擦身而过=遗憾？
不好好珍惜=遗憾？
没捉紧机会=遗憾？
总结来说，一切都是错过了，
遗憾因为错过了。。。
常常跟自己说，做任何事不要让自己后悔，
即使做错了决定，
也不应该去想后悔，
而是去想该怎么做才不会后悔，
因为当初会那样决定/选择必定有原因的，
所以后悔无补于事。

但是后悔跟遗憾扯得上关系吗？
可以尽管不后悔自己所做的，
因为后悔都是因为自己的错，但是
但是，
遗憾是我们的选择吗
？
不知道， 没有答案，
遗憾。。。。
后悔。。。。
不一样

不喜欢被忽略的感觉，不喜欢被隐瞒的感觉，更不喜欢被骗的感觉！！！

生活~~

生活让我忙忙忙，
有时会无言，
有时会开心，满足，
但有时也会不开心，
心理的因素很重要！！！！

学会控制而不是被控制！！！

雨过天晴

看会过去，只有一个淡笑，=）
就这样忘了吧，应该是放下，
往前走
我不在乎了吗
再想也是没有用。。。。

意外。。。开心的意外

想要说，很开心，你今天打电话给我，但是我在驾车，又紧张，所以很赶得把电话关了，就只是那么短短的几秒，我的心情可以好一整天。。。

梦过了就要醒

梦过了，就是醒来的时候了，
人依然要活在当下！
加油吧！你可以的！！努力！！！对你有信心！！！！
这一类勉励自己的话，骗了自己好几遍，
是时候，真的时候了。。。

犹如一场梦

生活规律被我颠倒了好几天，
感受到了后遗症，还是决定来睡一场大觉，
刚刚睡了很久，也不知道睡了几个小时，可能很短可能很长，
但是就是觉得很久，睡了很久很久，
醒来，
觉得自己的人生好像一场梦，就真的像是梦，
我的过去也只是一段回忆，
看回以前，除了像一场刚发的梦，也换来一句：你不够成熟。
此时此刻，我的过去也换来了一个淡淡的笑，
也许是好事，颓废的终点，又是我新开始的起点！！！
虽然这告诉了自己很多次，都没维持很久，但好过没有开始，
再来一次吧！！！！跌倒了，爬起来，再跌，再爬！！！

孤独万岁失恋无罪
谁保证一觉醒来有人陪
我对於人性早有预备
还不算太黑 yeah！！

hot chocolate

他跟我说过：“人不开心时，去高的地方心情会比较容易释放”，。。。 所以我很喜欢高。。去到sky bridge 有种兴奋感，但是上到41楼，觉得很矮！！不过我满足了。。。。然后去荡秋千，找回要飞的自由感，不想下来。。。好花不常开，好景不常在。。。美好的时光不会永远停留，所以要好好把握，不然后悔来不及。。。

别忘了回头看看我

我等着。。。

回头看看

很久很久没有回来了，都不记得自己写过什么了，
刚才看会自己写的东西，又一番回忆，
尤其是“爱情来了”那篇，
令我更觉得很旧了，
因为，，，那个爱情已经走了，它走了，他也离开了，
一切只能变成回忆，

是我不够成熟，还达不到你的要求，很怀念你走以后。。。
想起叮当的歌--我爱他。。。
现在只能对自己傻笑，过去是回不来的，只能往前走，
忘记是不可能的，只能做到放下。。。

i can do tat！！！
加油吧，不是你的勉强也没有用，
但是我很满足，依然是朋友就很开心的，
如果可以，以前不要再提一字，
从新认识你，从新认识我，
因为我保证我变了，我觉得你也有些改变，
朋友，等你打电话给我。。。
傻婆就是我！